Thursday, March 30, 2017

"Hey how ya doing?" "Not great!"

Hey there! I'm not totally great right now!
So, I'll be honest here, I'm a trainwreck. A trash fire. A...other things I can call myself. It's 8:32, and I am TIRED.
Graduation is coming up, and I've been wait listed for one grad school, while two have yet to get back to me, and two have said "Sorry, you kind of didn't finish your whole application." So yeah.
Not sure what I'm going to do. I'm pretty fucking scared, fam.
Cam, my really neato boyfriend, mentioned that sometimes you won't end up getting a job in the field you go into. I know that. I know that really well, but I'm getting a BS in speech, hearing, and language disorders. That seems pretty friggin specific. I'm not exactly sure what to do. I've been fortunate enough to have parents who were willing and able to pay for my tuition. If I were to come back, I'd have to do it on my own. I'm really sick of having to ask them for help all the time.
In other news, my had breast cancer. That's right, HAD. She's completely cancer free as of a few weeks ago. That's one good thing.
Last semester was kind of awful. There was a lot of drama in my life (that I wasn't part of, but was around), I was working at McDonalds (it wasn't terrible, but my anxiety would kick me in the guts like every hour before I had to go in), there was the impending doom of the strike the faculty was going on, an d of course, grad apps. I'm still here though. I made it.
I can make it this semester, too. It's just a matter of getting over this slump I've been in. I don't want to care, but I care too much. I want to keep calm, but it ain't working.
Now, I have an Aural Rehab exam to study for, and only another two hours and 20 minutes to do so before my first class of the day.
Peace out.